How to Become an Illegal Immigrant in Turkey (Part IV)

Danielle writing:

I thought I should take the time to share the exciting story of how I became an illegal in Turkey. While in Europe I have been traveling on my UK passport and David, on his US one. Upon arriving in Istanbul I quickly consulted my traveling bible, aka the Lonely Planet, regarding visas in Turkey. Heeding the advice of my nifty guide, we were both ready to pay 15 Euros to enter the country once we reached passport control. However, once there I was waived through without purchasing a visa, while David had to buy one. At the time I thought it a bit strange, but I should have known never to doubt what the Lonely Planet has to say.

At 2am on Sunday morning, David and I returned back to the airport for our return flight home. Once again at passport control, we struck up a friendly conversation with the officer helping us. It even turned out that he spoke some German and wanted to practice with us. Eventually, David was waived through to the other side while the officer still examined my passport. It seemed to be taking a rather long time for him allow me through to the other side. Finally he asked in broken German "how exactly did you arrive here in Turkey?" Perplexedly I looked at him and said "by plane" thinking what kind of idiot am I speaking with- after all we were in the airport. "Well how did you get in without a visa?" he replied. After trying to explain that the officer on the way in had told me I didn't need one, this officer went off to consult with the rest of his team (who looked like a bunch of burley teenagers standing around telling dirty jokes.) Eventually the "head officer" approached me and told me I would need to purchase the visa now. That was fine with me but David and I had absolutely no money on us and the man was adamant that we pay in cash. Now if you've ever tried arguing your way out of something with a Turk you'll know this didn't end well. At hearing my excuse of having no cash the officer began to scream over and over that this was not his problem (still don't know how he worked that out as it was one of his men that allowed me through in the first place) and that I would not be allowed to leave Turkey. Not wanting to be a new Turkish immigrant I asked if we could use an ATM to draw some money for the visa. I was permitted to do this but then had to report to the information desk to clear up the issue.

At the information desk, the attendants had absolutely no idea how my situation could have possibly occurred. In fact they didn't really even know how to deal with it. All one man said was "yes these things happen in Turkey." Then they requested a document from the officer who had sent me there. Not knowing what on earth that was, I explained that I had been given no such thing. Again, silence. After a few minutes I was made to point out the officer who had sent me there. Well this seemed to really send the officer into a tail spin. He stomped over to where I stood and began a rampage of how if I left now without a visa I would never be welcome in Turkey again. I would have a note in my passport saying that if I where to ever return I must swiftly be turned out. After about five minutes of this we finally managed to pay and I was awarded my visa (pictured top left) which was really nothing more that a dinky little sticker and a stamp. Quickly we ran from the officer and headed for shelter at out gate.